


Gasoline

by Dutchess_2020



Category: X-Men - All Media Types
Genre: F/M, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-03-17
Updated: 2020-12-10
Packaged: 2021-02-28 16:47:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 3,472
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23190377
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dutchess_2020/pseuds/Dutchess_2020
Summary: Gasoline is an Energymanipulator. She can make fire coming out of her hands from nowhere. She's the master of puppets, she can teleport herself and she's a Shape converter like Mistique. She can shift herself in everybody she sees, and take their voices too. And she has sharp metal wings, from who she can even shoot her razor sharp metal feathers. They reproduce immediately. Her wings are like them, Angel had after his transformation.But she has a big problem. She messed up.
Relationships: Charles Xavier/OC, Logan/Kurt Wagner
Comments: 2
Kudos: 4





	1. I messed up

I did a huge mistake. I don't wanna get thrown out from the institute. It's my only family I ever had. And now I sit in Charles office, he looks at me with anger from his wheelchair from the other side from the desk. Shit! 

*Flashback, earlier this day*

I walk trough the hallway as suddenly Rouge comes to me. Other students and some of the xmen are arround us. 

,,Hey you ugly slut." She spits in my direction. 

Rouge was always against me. She always hated me. From the first day I came here for two years. She always makes me down, but I always skilfully ignored it. But right now I just feel anger. I spread my right wing, and cut her in the face. It's not a deep cut, and she don't need stitches but it hurts. Then I bang her against the wall. 

,,You little slut messed with the wrong one. I always tried to ignore you, but you have gone too far." I Growl into her face. 

Fights with someone or killing someone who lives in this institut is strictly forbidden here. If you do it you have to reckon with the fact that you will be thrown out. Without a chance to come back. That's why I always swallowed it down, the whole anger she set on fire in me. But I try to swallow it for two years now. I can't hold back anymore. I spread my wing again, ready to stab her into the heart, with my razor sharp metal feathers. 

,,Gasoline stop it!" Suddenly hear Charles yell. 

Oh shit. I messed up. Rouge just start laughing evil at me. That little bitch! I let go of her. And then I told my sharp metal wings loosely on my back again. 

*Flashback end* 

Then I had to follow Charles into his office. And here I sit. 

,,What the hell is your fucking problem Gasoline?" He growls.

,,I'm sorry! But I had my reason. She always makes me down science I'm here. I always swallowed my anger, but today, it was just too much. I couldn't stand it." I justifie myself. 

,,I don't care. You Was about to kill her! Killing and fighting with people who live here will be punished with a throw-out! You know that, too." He growls.

,,You wanna throw me out?" I say shocked. 

,,Yes Pack your things and go!" He growls.

I start crying. My heart broke into a million pieces, I lost my home, my family, my friends here, I lost the love of my life, and yes it is Charles, and I must go out there in the human world again. All Rouges fault! I can't. I Just be hunted there. I won't find an apartment there. I'm a monster! And I tell that Charles. But he dosent care. I'm down with him, he doesn't even look at me anymore. I'm a nothing! If I didn't had such a strong self-healing factor, I would kill myself immediately.

But I can't. If I cut myself on my wings, wich sometimes happen, the wound is there for two seconds and then I'm perfectly fine again like nothing happend. I let out a sob. It is my own fault. Even though Rouge made me angry. I stand up.

,,I'm so sorry." I whisper.

Then I walk outside and upstairs to my room. On the way to my room I see Rouge again. She's waiting outside my room. And so does Logan and Storm. I don't look at them. I just go inside my room crying. Yes normally I'm a cold killer and show no feelings, but this fall was verry hard and painful.


	2. What I've done

I open my closet. And then I get my suitcase out. I lay it open on my bed. Fuck! What I've done! I fall crying to the floor. I can't. My back fall against the open closet. I almost falled backwards in it. Normally this would make me laugh, but it's the wrong situation. Old Professor X kiked me out because I was bullied and lost control. Pff. What a mess. I just sit there crying.

Yes even I have feelings. Even though I don't show them often. I hear how someone comes in. Maybe it's Rouge, Logan and Storm. Logan was always like a best friend for me. He knows that. And so was I for him. But I messed that up to probably with my action.

,,I'm sorry Rouge. I-I-I've been trough some bad shit. You know, I lost my parents, Had to beat me through life on my own, fight that I survive, I was only called a monster by everyone. I just couldn't tame my anger anymore. It just reminded me of that time. I had a flashback. I'm so sorry." I sob.

But she didn't answer. I don't notice how Charles sit in his wheelchair at my open door, Hank stand beside him in his beast Form. He always carry the old Professor X and his wheelchair up-and-downstsairs in his beast Form, whenever Charles needs it. He's the strongest for this job, and with his Heit wether Charles nor his wheelchair hit the ground, the wall or the stairs. 

I stand up again. Then I start to get my jeans and my jeggins slowly out of the closet, and put them into my suitcase. A sob left again and again my mouth, and tears stream unstoppable down my face. I'm a failure. I deserve it. Then I take my hoodies out, and put them with shaky hands in my suitcase to the jeans and jeggins. Iet out another loud sob. I'm a mess. Then I put my T-shirts, tanktops, socks and my pullovers in my suitcase. That's it. My closet is empty. I put my shoes and phone charger in my rucksack. I close both, and lay the Rucksack on my suitcase.

That's it. It's over. I take a look arround in my room again, but avoid seeing in the direction where the door is. I will miss this. I sob again. Then I take a deep breath, before I pull the backpack on my left shoulder and take the suitcase in my hand. I've only just made the bed, they can keep that. I left the bedding here too. I'm not going to find an apartment anyway. Then I turn to the door but look to the ground. I sob again. Before I start walking. 

I walk past Storm, Logan and Rouge. Then I go out the door. I walk past Charles and Hank. I see them in the corner of the eye. I sob again. I'm such a miscarriage. I walk slowly to the stairs. With shaky hands and legs. My metal wings are shaking too. It's rare for me to show my feelings. But it's unormal that I'm crying in public. Even when I'm alone sometimes, I don't show any feelings. But I just can't hold it back. Then I take the first step.

,,Wait!" I hear Rouge's voice.

I stop. But I don't turn arround.

,,I didn't know that. I'm sorry. I didn't want you to be kicked out. I really mean that." She says.

,,It's alright. What you deserve is what you get. That's why I'm kiked out. I should h-have held back. But I-I didn't." I sob.

,,I'm sorry Rouge." I say.

Then I sob again, and take another step. Until I'm downstairs. Then I walk straight to the door. I take a look arround again. Sobbing. Charles normlay doesn't yell at you. When he does, you really messed up. And when he yell at you, you're through with him. I saw many students getting a kik, and they had to leave. Charles never ever looked at them again, or brought them back.

I sob again. Then I open the two big brown doors. Shit I messed up. But it's my fault. Yes Rouge mobbed me, but I could have held back my anger. I didn't.


	3. Chapter 3

I walk outside and close the doors behind me. Then I take two steps, before I stop and turn around again. Looking at the institute makes my heard ache even worse. Then I turn arround again. Where I go now? I'm lost. I sob again. I look arround. It's beautiful here, green Gras and flowers. But as I see straight where the path goes, it ends in a darker forest. The path leads trough the wood out into the city. I have a choice. Either I live in the woods or in the city. Butt both is not "living". In the city I probably get hunted, hated and bullied, and in the forest, I'm lonesome and it's somdeays cold.

I choose the second. The forest seem a bit better then hunted down, hated and get bullied. Maybe then I really become a monster, and kill innocent and anxious people. I mean rouge bullied me, and I almost killed her. I sob again. My vision is blurry because of all the tears. I feel so sorry. I couldn't control myself. I start slowly walking towards the woods. I sigh. From today I guess I have to chase my food. Like in the wild west. I'm nearly in the forest now.

I need to build me some sort of roof I guess. I lay down my rucksack and suitcase outside of the institute. Then I look arround. Crying, sobbing and with a blurry view. I don't notice how Hank, Rouge, Charles, Storm and Logan are watching me from the doorway. I look arround. But here are nothing more then trees and leaves. So how should I build my roof. Damit! I let myself fall on the dirty ground. I can't. I'm down. My huge razor sharp wings are hanging loosely from my body on either side. Otherwise I can't sit. I sob again. Fuck. I wish that I can turn back time. But I can't. Damit! 

I sit there crying for twenty minutes at least. Then I look arround again. I sigh. Then I stand up again, and fold my wings again loosely on my back. I walk arround searching. But I find nothing. So I walk back to my things. And suddenly it starts to rain heavily. Yes the leaves from the trees are a shield at least a little bit. But I get wet anyways. My phone is in the Waterproof suitcase. I don't have to worry about that. I'm glad my wings can't rust. I spread the right wing, hold it over my head as a shield. It works. I feel the rain on my metal wings. Yes I have feelings in them. Weird as it is.

Then I hear thunder. Great. I have metal wings!! What the hell. You see, they are more useful then real feather wings but have mor contra's then pro's. Maybe a lightning can kill me. I never tryed it. But then they would finally get rid of me. So I sit down again. Left wing completely spread out to the left, and right wing still over my head as a shield. Then another thunder, but this time with lightning. I sigh. I'm still crying. But the tears are slowly running try. I just don't have any strength anymore. In addition to the thunderstorm, there is now also strong winds. Great.


	4. The penalty

I sit here maybe hours in a heavy thunderstorm. Until now no lightning hit me. Let's see if it stays this way. My heart is aching. Because I love Charles, and lost my family. The only one I've ever had.

,,Gasoline." I suddenly hear Logans voice.

I flinch. Then I start shaking. I don't know why the hell in suddenly afraid of him.

,,Don't be afraid. The Professor wants to speak with you. He's in his office." Logan speaks again.

I stand up, fold my wings loosely on my back, and turn arround to him.

,,Why would he?" I sob.

Logan hugs me. I was first petrified. But then I hug him shyly back. We both are damn wet. I take my things and follow Logan. Back in the institute I place my suitcase and backpack before Charles office. I see how Logan bend down and Kiss Nightcrawler softly, before Kurt 'port them away. Sweet. I knock on the door.

,,Come in." He shouts.

Another loud thunder and bright lightning. I'm so wet that my cloths drip. But that doesn't seem to bother Charles. I have special Tops with buttons on the back under the place where my wings have grown. At the point where the wings have grown, there are appropriately cut holes. So dressing is easy for me. I open the buttons, then I slip out of the sleeves and done. Whether hoodie, blouse tanktop or sweater. Even my bra's are tailored for me and my wings.

I turn arround and close the door. Then I walk too the two chairs, but this time I stop behind them, and look sad on one of the chairs. I'm still shaking. But this time from the cold. He throws a towel at me. I catch it. And look shyly at him. He only nods at me. I dry my clothes the best as I can, without ripping the towel on my razor sharp metal feathers. He takes the towel back, and place it on the radiator behind him.

,,You know Gasoline...." he starts.

,,I know. I'm a monster and what I-I did was bad. I-I'm so so sorry." I sob.

I look on the chair again. I'm still shaking. Even my metal wings are shaking. 

,,It was." he only answers. 

,,Pl-pleas forgive me. It will never happen again!" I sob.

But he didn't answer. Why the hell am I in here? Only because that he can say things to me that I already know? What the hell! I want to leave. But he stops me.

,,I Forgive you." He suddenly say.

I look at him surprised and confused. I mean I'm glad, but it's to good to be true.

,,I mean it. Go to your room. But I keep an special eye on you!

*Time jump two days later*

My room is refurnished. But no one pay attention to me. Even Logan treats me as if I'm air. I'm kind of to blame myself. I go downstairs. There again, I see Logan and Kurt kissing, before Nightcrawler teleports them away. Then I see Profesor X, Rouge and Storm standing there in a circle near the two big brown doors. The stand and sit (Charles) before Charles office door, wich is not far away from the exit. I walk past them. At least I tried. But then Charles stops me.

,,Gasoline." He says.

I stop right away. What I've done now? I think to myself. I turn arround.

,,Yes Professor X?" I say with a friendly voice.

I look at him. He never send me on missions. Some students wich seem strong enough, are sometimes sent on small missions. I've never. I'd love to be an X-men. But I accept that this will only be one of my dreams.

,,You will do the washing up today after dinner. Alone!" He says.

I look at him in shock. Then I only turn arround and walk away. Yes normally three students are divided every morning, lunch and evening to rinse the dishes, to place it in the dishwasher, and to dry it and stow it away again.

Three hours later after finishing dinner, I start with the dishes. As I suddenly hear a loud scream coming from outside....


	5. Punishment

The secret side of me, I never let you see  
I keep it caged but I can't control it  
So stay away from me, the beast is ugly  
I feel the rage and I just can't hold it

I put the plates down, and run outside. There I see Charles with a gun pointet to his head by an agent. At least he's dressed like an agent. I do a short process. I spread my left wing, and shot three feathers. They hit the guy in the back, in the back of his head and in his left thigh. But I shot them so fast, that the second feather shot right trough is brain.

It's scratching on the walls, in the closet, in the halls  
It comes awake and I can't control it  
Hiding under the bed, in my body, in my head  
Why won't somebody come and save me from this, make it end?

The guy fall lifeless to the ground, and so did the gun. Charles turn his electric wheelchair arround, and look at me surprised. But he says nothing. So I turn arround and go back to work. That's a lot of plates and Cutlery. Three of them need two hours for that all. But I'm alone. I think I'll be done tomorrow morning. I pick up one plate after another. First I spray them with water and then I put them in the dishwasher. I always put in some cutlery too.

I feel it deep within, it's just beneath the skin  
I must confess that I feel like a monster  
I hate what I've become, the nightmare's just begun  
I must confess that I feel like a monster

Then I pull the upper part of the dishwasher down, and let it work. On the other side you can pull it out and dry it with towels. After some time the dishwasher finished. I take a towel and open the lid from the dishwasher. Then I pull the basket with the dishes to the right. 

I, I feel like a monster  
I, I feel like a monster

I just want to take a plate in my hand to dry it, as I hear how Charles drives in. I try not to look at him. And so I start drying the plates and cutlery. Charles watching me. Then I put the basket back in the machine, and do the same again.

,,Thank you Gasoline." He starts.

,,Not for that. I'm glad I could help. I like to help others." I sigh.

My whole body starts to tingle again, and my heart beats faster. By only the thought of Charles sits in the doorway in his wheelchair. Yes we have four baskets. But on my own, one is enough. It don't care how fast you work, when you are alone one is enough, You're slow one way or the other. No matter how much you hurry or make an effort. I sigh again.

My secret side I keep hid under lock and key  
I keep it caged, but I can't control it  
'Cause if I let him out he'll tear me up, break me down  
Why won't somebody come and save me from this, make it end?

,,You do?" He asks.

,,What? Helping people? Yes I like that. I wish I could do it more." I sigh.

Then I work again. It's still a lot of work. I'm halfway there now. And I don't feel like it anymore. Charles is still watching me, strange. I'm bored. It's exhausting. If we were three, I wouldn't complain. But I'm alone. I see in the corner of my eye how Charles rolls in. I stop my work again, and look at him.

,,You want that?" He whispers.

,,Yes. I know that it never comes true. That it's only one of my dreams." I sigh.

It's hiding in the dark, it's teeth are razor sharp  
There's no escape for me, it wants my soul, it wants my heart  
No one can hear me scream, maybe it's just a dream  
Maybe it's inside of me, stop this monster

Then I turn arround again. More hours have passed. And I'm finally done. It took me four hours. Then I turn off the dishwasher and turn arround. But Charles is still sitting there. Or maybe he again sits there. I want to walk outside but Charles blocking the door. As he suddenly grabs me on the shirt collar and pull me down to him. What the hell? Suddenly I feel his soft lips on mine. I'm to surprised to do something. But then he separate from me. Maybe it was only a test. How I would react.

I feel it deep within, it's just beneath the skin  
I must confess that I feel like a monster  
I hate what I've become, the nightmare's just begun  
I must confess that I feel like a monster

Charles pets my back. I immediately spread out my wings to the left and right, as far as possible. I don't want him to cut himself. And he seems to notice it. He looks into my turquoise eyes. I don't want to hurt him too. I'm a monster, but I don't wanna be one. 

,,I love you." He whispers.  
-  
Songtext: Skillet-Monster


End file.
